source: takushkanshkan

'Immortal Rose'

....because everything about philosophical movements are beautiful.

Oh my lord, you'll never believe where I'm blogging this from - under the sink.

You know the feeling where you've been staring at summarized notes and lecture slides all day and you're supposed to get something? But you don't. And the state of chaos that your room is in is just so ugh that you don't even have space to walk properly without actually tripping on books, pencils, pens or just some odd bottle of sanitizer? It's as if intellectual hell has just been released on you so much so that the only place that can accommodate both you and your laptop (without much of a distraction) - is under the bathroom sink.

I kid you not. It's actually a lot more cooler than my room and the internet reception is favourable.

If this is how procrastination works, I hate it. The worst feeling is knowing that you could've done something to prevent yourself from feeling as if you didn't know a thing...but still didn't do it. 

I'm thinking I should do some light reading after finals. But will there ever be a more appropriate time? Things are racing and flying past me. Nothing seems to be in control.

I heard of Haruki Murakami only last year, (I know-.- I'm such a whatever when it comes to following trends). At first sight, his works didn't impress me so much. Then I watched Norwegian Wood; yep, the whole close-to-three hours of it; and I found it intensely puzzling. I mean it in the sense that I was until up to that point, completely ignorant of people who lived in a world of their own; their psychological states spiralling out of control; feelings muted and magnified; their aspects so alien compared to our own.

It was beautiful. In a very disturbing way. It still is beautiful. When I saw Naoko (played by the brilliant Rinko Kikuchi); it was almost as if an immunity to grief had just been lifted. I don't know why; but it was almost liberating just watching her pull off her interpretation of grieving. 

And then Toru figuring out the difference between his love for Naoko and Midori was basically the highlight of the entire show. It's such an essential thing, don't you agree; to know yourself. Like for example, knowing what you're attracted to, what you prefer, what you feel and the extent of feeling it.

But Toru and Naoko confuse me. Midori seemed to be the only person who remained clear throughout the entire show. It does bug me a little that she's stick-thin and looks almost child-like. 

via fashion-and-film

“What I feel for Naoko is a tremendously quiet and gentle and transparent love, but what I feel for Midori is a wholly different emotion. It stands and walks on its own, living and breathing and throbbing and shaking me to the roots of my being. I don’t know what to do. I’m confused. I’m not trying to make excuses for myself, but I do believe that I have lived as sincerely as I know how. I have never lied to anyone, and I have taken care over the years not to hurt other people. And yet I find myself tossed into this labyrinth. How can this be? I can’t explain it. I don’t know what I should do.”

—	Toru Watanabe, Norwegian Wood

source: justizze

Sen Mitsuji

Hey there, I just needed a minute.

I just wish I could match up to the level of his intensity now,

as if he couldn't give a shit if something went wrong.

My life feels so crushed at the moment. 

source: peterhongphoto

Without a further explanation, I think I've been making progress. Oh gracious; I just needed a moment to take some time off and exclaim at my extreme enthusiasm of my upcoming term break.

I haven't actually been sleeping much lately; which makes me worried about the outcome it would have on me physically. I suppose that's why I prefer not to drive these days, for fear of crashing into something, perhaps? But sometimes I have to think sleep's a waste of time; a way of depriving you of doing something else that's more productive.

With the end of official assignments and presentations, we're left to face with the fact that there's only ONE week left to study for finals - less than one week for some papers. I can't believe I didn't foresee this one. I completely neglected to spread my chapters out effectively; this is absolutely pathetic. 

So for the nights to come, I should apologize to myself for "going" to be kept awake into the wee hours, deprived of coffee (because I know it's bad for health) AND food (because snacking in the middle of the night leads to horrible-horrible weight-gain) and just plenty of peace and silence. 

Therefore myself; this is a short heads-up to you that your working and sleeping hours will thus be screwed immensely. 

via indecisive-life 

Chiharu Shiota

Read about her here.

Everything about her work disturbs me. Yet, it just feels so suitable - best to describe how screwed I'm feeling now. Today didn't go too well. Revision week is breezing by too quickly and there's too many things to study. I need more time. I need more time.

I saw you from the balcony today. You didn't notice it. It's pretty hilarious how much damage thinking out loud can do, 'Oh...look, he's in the car.' And I find an entire army of eyes upon my every reaction.

Sometimes I wish that people were just so simple and easy to get along with, why do they always have to complicate things by bringing emotions, religion, intelligence and age into the question. So what? So what? It doesn't matter to me, that's what I'm supposed to say; because it's only politically correct - but it does. It does matter a lot.

source: prettygirlfood

I'm hungry:( But it's time for more studying.